...quiet, about a lot of things...
Sunday, November 05, 2006
Morning for Sunday Scribblings
We put a bark collar on Mia last night. My morning,hence, has been quiet..so far. I feel like a real tyrant for doing this. I don't think electro-shock therapy is humane for People. Why subject my dog?
Because ELECTRICITY is one thing she seems to respect. Since the electric fence went up..she has stayed in our yard. Chain link fences.. 5 foot wood barriers...oh no..no match for her..Short of razor wire twirled on the top like a crazy violent flourish, an electric fence was actually a compromise! I did briefly consider a moat... but found out that it was against my covenant regulations and restrictions. Drat! I've always wanted an alligator..oh well.
What does ANY OF THIS have to do with Mornings???(the gals at SS like us to stay on task..)Well..here goes the tie in... Each morning, Mia my dear, sweet,slobbery freedom craving, fence scaling St. Bernard loves to herald the dawn...by growling/barking/verbally eviscerating each and every stupid person that decides to walk their dogs off leash down the fairway that poses as our back yard.
I run down stairs each day...in panties and/or robe and fly out on my deck SCREAMING at her TO SHUT UP!!! I should be screaming at the STUPID ASS people who decide to terrorize my dog with their bait animals.. but I'm too nice for that. (clears her throat).
The golf course acts as an natural amphitheatre and our house sits at the opening,yes the quivering lips, of its huge gaping mouth. So at roughly 5:50 each morning..the whole neighbor hood gets treated to Mia's aria..."Go away, you wanky asshole..Get off my land" Then, my counter aria.."MIA, I swear if I had a gun..." (JUST KIDDING)
The whole incident puts a serious cramp in my down dog..sun salutation zen yoga vibe I"m trying to get going here...(Just Kidding again...girls, really..go clear a chakra or something).
But, as I sit here, I am struck with a much better idea... can't I just buy some remote control Electric device..so I can shock The Intruders, right at the head of the golf cart trail. So THEY STOP! Hey, I bet I could train Mia to push that button... She'd be really good at it...Her motto is to protect and serve...She loves the smell of voltage in the morning.. It smell like victory!! BOOOWWW WOOOOWWW!
Well that just about sums things up this morning...any time you're in the Denver area...stop by and I'll show you our whole set up...You'll know our house..just follow the audible buzzing in the air!
Oh what a beautiful morning..at Sunday Scribblings...