...quiet, about a lot of things...

Friday, November 02, 2007

With a Little Help From My Friends

Day two. Kay introduced me to a technique of Allen Ginsberg's. An American Sentence 17 syllables.

I usually find constraint, well, tight. But as the word "Tight" is used often by my professor (I guess that is what she is..she does have her PHD...) to compliment my work...I suppose I will see how I might tighten tight.


Just Love

He takes
the sharp
knife

and cuts
my steak.

Holds it
with no
judgement.

Just
love.


Really amazing. Not the poem. Just the realization that a moment can be brought to life in 17 syllables.

It also proves another of my classes observations about me. I work in "plain" language. I did not try for the words in this experiment..just wrote, and edited, as always...but it turns out 15 out of 16 words are one syllable. Only one two syllable word. Wow.

Thanks Kay, that was very revealing to me.

Oh, and by the way..I believe they are really all supposed to be in one sentence. But as always, I tweaked.. took what I liked...

You may be able to tighten..but never bind me. Not my style!
posted by wendy at 8:27 AM

2 Comments:

Thanks for the shout! I have to confess the idea comes from read.write.poem (ceridwen's suggestion) on NaBloWriMo. Check it out.
LOVE your 17-syllable poem. Wonderful! I am guessing you can do what you like with the 17 syllables.

11/3/07, 12:14 AM  

I have put a link to read.write.poem at the top of my sidebar ...

11/3/07, 12:29 AM  

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